restless fingers

Elephantine egos!

2011-05-09T07:11:00.000-07:00

E - MC(square)
E is Ecstacy in marriage
M is Maturity
C is Capability
C is Care
Ecstacy in a marriage can be derived only when you have the maturity and the capability to Care.
My Dad did. My friend Jatin does. Ananth another friend cares. And many wonderful men do.
But some men, dont!
So, this one's for all the guys who do not have the balls to accept a woman as she is, this one’s dedicated for you.
Like every girl who is of my age and seeks for an arrange marriage, I have been through the grueling experience of match fixing process or the match making process. Thankfully, my parents are supportive and do not force into things. Its break time for me for a while!
Since childhood we have been taught at home that girls and boys are the same. Except for the biological differences and the few qualities which define our identity, we are to be educated, nurtured, pampered in the equal proportion and rewarded accordingly.
Here's a situation:
Mr. X is a software engineer and has a lot of zeros in his salary. Oh My! he drives the latest model of the car but guess what! He needs a customized girl just like the other gadgets.
The girl has pursued her choicest of profession gauging her dreams aspirations.
Unfortunately, Mr. X’s program for the customized girl does not accept it. So despite the qualities the girl possesses, she is rejected.
To all the men with elephantine egos,
While we are prepared to leave our nests and come along to a different world. Is it not a man's duty to accept a woman as she is? Or if the man does not like her just say it instead of making shrewd comments on her dreams and aspirations? Customize your software and your gadgets not our dreams!

Has anyone ever asked why did the boy pursue his XYZ course in an ABC University? Why are the girls decisions being magnified? Why do certain men act that they have all the power in the world to choose and why are the middlemen catalyzing it?

Marriage is a beautiful relation in which a man and woman, live together, to take care of each other. A woman does all her duties and a man does his. They live together not by their degree of education but by the degree of tolerance, the degree of love and the degree of emotion they share.

An excerpt from the book, Spouse by Shobha De
"People no longer converse - they perform. They are so busy "presenting" themselves to the world that the role playing rarely stops even in their most intimate relationships"

Mediocrity Sucks!!

2011-03-22T10:00:00.000-07:00

How many times have you not stopped reading a book or skipped through the pages of a book so overtly praised?
How many times have you glanced at a beautiful dress but placed it back for it missed perfection? (for the girls, especially)
Each of us..
love to read the best, wear the best or even watch the best.
“Please adjust” is a curse which we cannot escape.
We can adjust with people and their habits not with products.
Unfortunately, in the course of life, we begin to adjust with products and not with people.
My uncle is the biggest lover of discipline while his coworkers are not , so when he asks them to do something great and 9/10 times they do it but they fail one time, they are reprimanded.
However, if my uncle’s cell phone refuses to work, he will never go to the repair shop, he will wait for it never does such a thing. This is the first time.
how ridiculous. how unjust.
how many times have we given the products we use a second chance or fallen in love with our cell phone but the person we know for years has been looked down upon or hardly cared for?
I bet innumerable times.
You have been the sweetest employee or the best employee but an arrogant son or a busy daughter?
Mediocrity is not being average but it is also being one-faced or biased to the “profitable” party. You cannot do it when you very well know if you work a little, you can.
How unfortunate! How mediocre is our personality to fulfill the outwardly being or the source of it but cannot quench our spiritual or our emotional being.
If this post hurts, then realize mediocrity sucks and its time you work towards your internal or spiritual growth. As a teacher from the course “art of living” says “do not use your intelligence in relations, let the heart think.”

This growth doesn’t happen overnight. Practice patience and love and everything else will fall in place. It is easier said than done but worth trying especially if you can bring smiles on your loved ones faces. Each of us is wonderful in a crude form though and hence we need to mould ourselves. I will not leave this post on a crude note, I shall mention few things that have worked wonders and this post is not a spurt of emotions/thought but a braid of actions that has inspired me to write. Art of living classes help too. Anyway, few points out of my own experience and yes! I need to learn a lot too.
1. Think ahead. The after effect. Yesterday when my best friend shouted at me, how I wished to say something rude. I contemplated a second before speaking my mind filled with filth at that moment.
2. Who is the person standing in front of you? What has he/she done to you? Think of the wonderful moments if spend together. Difficult? Not very if you practice it regularly.

"Once Thara fell from the bike. She dint tell me about it. When I saw her bike I realized she met with an accident. In normal times I would have got enraged coz she hid such a thing from me and dint share it. But I held my nerve n asked her calmly n she told me about it I pacified her, ensured she got first aid done n took care of her :) That way she forgot the incident soon” A once short-tempered but slowly becoming calm husband, Ananth J.P.

Spread your wings and be that person you always wanted in your life :).

2 states

2011-03-11T22:51:00.001-08:00

I am not speaking of Chetan Bhagat’s novel here. But about the 2 states here in Andhra Pradesh which is the latest buzz. No Not Telangana and Andhra. But my own 2 states “Lost” and “Perplexed” as the latest Question that is being asked whenever someone reads my name plate which hesitantly hangs around my work station is “What are you?” To clear any apparent confusion. My name is Nivedita Narsapuram. “Narsapuram” happens to be my hometown. My ancestors, forefathers are from that place. The place “Narsapur(am)” is seated in Andhra and a placed named as “Narsapuram” is in Telangana Region.
Rewinding to my childhood.
At 6 a.m. every day, my grandfather would be dressed to perform his daily puja. My 2 cousins and I would often be curious to know what my grandfather did for almost an hour. We would not hear a loud voice. Only intermittently we would hear some slokas. In Sanskrit, we surmised. Even during puja, our extended family would occupy the puja room and never did we get a chance to look at his puja room.
Years later, my grandfather on our new year, called us and tied a holy thread on our hand. We entered the puja room for the first time. The Puja room glittered with white marble. We looked around, excited. We were so happy that we were in the room which we tried to get in by our many failed attempts.
As we lowered our head, we saw something we never imagined and we now know why our grandfather locked it for years for us and opened it only we were mature enough to take the knowledge.
He had a picture of “Lord Krishna” “Lord Jesus Christ” “Lord Allah” “Lord Mahaveer” and “Lord Budha.”
We were so surprised! “What are we?” was the first question my cousin blurted. I was shocked that my stupid cousin asked this question. My grandfather, often known for his strictness looked at her for a moment. I said “Now toh you are gone!”
He slowly rose and said sweetly “We are all humans”
We wondered why my grandpa was explaining science to us. We laughed and never asked anything again. My grandparents moved on with my uncle and family into a bigger flat while we (my parents and I) stay in the same flat taking care of it. Somehow, the memory of My grandpa’s puja room always lingered.

Years later, when the question “What are you” replays I reiterate what my grandpa said “I am a human!”
and they laugh just like we did…

2010-12-24T07:31:00.000-08:00

At first, they were grueling. Every minute of it becomes unbearable. If the one who is watching it is feeling so miserable then how about the one who faces the torment?
The serials on Colors is what I am speaking of and they highlight problems which are common in rural India. While serials like Balika Vadhu speak of Child Marriage.

Na Aana Is Des Lado Speaks of Female Infanticide. It is still practiced in rural India. With developing technology, they do not wait for the girl child to be born, once through sonography the sex is determined, the bud is nipped.
Rishton Se Badi Pratha is the latest on the charts and that is what inspired me write this post. Honor Killing. How many of us have not heard of it? In India, while members of the family are killed for getting married without acceptance of the family. Worst in some countries, a girl was killed for chatting to a man on Facebook. For more info: http://www.amnestyusa.org/violence-against-women/stop-violence-against-women-svaw/honor-killings/page.do?id=1108230
That is what this serial emphasizes on. The cruelty of family members to save their pride is portrayed. For the weak hearted, this is one is a monster but yes, a well depicted one! The helplessness of the “love birds” is picturized very well.

It is believed and also witnessed that when one of the love birds in a pair succumbs to death, the other is helpless and soon dies. In our holy books, we learn on eternal love, in practice we leave no stone unturned to break them. What an Irony!
I was unable to sleep for a day thinking of it. While we live cribbing about our comfortable lives digging imaginary problems or creating some and then cribbing about it.
As we approach a new year, lets vow to make a difference to our lives and in turn others by not making unnecessary fuss and also, not close our eyes to the problems that surround us. Be it at home or neighbour hood, let us fight it like our own. I vow to do. Do you?

Few organizations you can start with (I get no commission for promoting them)
http://www.savegirlchild.org/
http://www.handandcloth.org/

Eulogy

2010-09-07T22:32:00.001-07:00

Baljeet aunty. A strong optimistic woman who lived with no fear in her heart and a lot of courage in her spirit. Often we went to her home, to meet our friends, Balwan and Chintu. They have been living in our Apartments in Hyderabad two floors below ours for the past two decades almost. Serving us hot parathas served with ghee, she would enquire about our well-being and speak/advise to us about our future. She was amongst the few who supported me when I changed my field from IT to Journalism. Against the why’s, do/do nots, she explained to my mother that I should do what I like and identified me as the “generation of those people who had no choice but engineering”.
Anyway, it pains my heart when I learnt that she is not amongst us anymore. It hurt even more to read it in the paper that it was a cruel accident (the link: http://www.hindu.com/2010/09/07/stories/2010090761390500.htm ). Never would one want to see the name of their closed one like this in the paper. Even my hands trembled to compose a mail to her son, Chintu, who lives in New Zealand to speak of Aunty’s death (as Chintu was a student, he carried no mobile).

One of the reasons, I share this ghastly incident is to convey that our society is not divided on caste, sex, or religion. It is divided on basis of money, the rich and the poor. The rich can get away and push it on the poor who often have no choice.
On probing further in to the car accident matter, the police closed the matter as the person who hit aunty’s cab said that his driver did it and he is absconding. How convenient!

D'n'E

2009-06-22T22:25:00.000-07:00

His august presence

…. seduced his valiance

Helpless! In gusto

He’d gaze at the maestro

Alas!

Discrimination was the lord’s maiden name

Teaching him would be a shame

Dogged!

His eager hands sculpted the lord,

made it his teaching abode

Practiced all day

Surpassed the best pupil

Whence to the lord’s dismay

“Who art thou? Besieged my best pupil!”

“I am thine pupil O! Lord”

“Thine sculpture is my abode”

He saith pointing to the sculpture

“O! Sculptor

Thine dedication has won my heart

Perhaps, it’s time you pay for the art”

“Ask me anything …. Even my life”

“No! O benign sculptor

All I need is thine thumb”

Whilst the rest stayed benumbed

Ekalavya cut it with pride

And presented it to his god
Unhappy, Dronacharya took it along…

For Ekalavya was his greatest student

But he dared not to be prudent!!

Dronacharya was a good teacher but Ekalavya was a greater student..

There are very few like him…

This poem is written with a purpose

This is our fourth season at DnE(DronaCharya and Eklavya) a tutorship mentorship program at Bhumi, a hyderabad based ngo

We want every student dwelling in our slums to be an Ekalavya..

While these children are smart but an inspiration..a tutor is necessary

All it needs to be an inspiration is courage to volunteer ...a heart to volunteer

if you know anybody who volunteers to teach these children… Maths Science or English at Hyderabad it would be great..
Please get back to me at sweetz.ritz@gmail.com

and this is not social service... It is social work...Work socially towards the betterment of our country so that we can live happily!!

Thank you!!!
Btw… the pass percentage has risen from meager 5 percent to 56%

We aren’t happy yet as we Hope to make it 100 percent

for further details:

www.bhumi.in

REPORTING aLive

2009-06-08T08:03:00.000-07:00

Beyond the shine and sheen of the glittering world of media, lies a black patch camouflaged with light of the tube. More the colours, vibrant the channel and thus darker the patch.

A patch which rules out all the morales. Decides the righteous path weighing the publicity one gets. While everybody in the media circuit knows of the dark patch but chooses not to speak of it for obvious reasons.

I had been very lucky to know of it while studying about the subject itself. Although, I wasn’t deluged but then again, it was disappointing to learn the tricks of the trade.

Before I move further I short intro: I began working once I enrolled myself for a Post graduation diploma in mass communication. I have done my engineering and moving to mass communication was my personal choice(FOR THE FIRST TIME I MADE A CHOICE).
In the classroom, as the lecturer boasted about the different flowers in the garden of media and how one can do his best to make a difference in the society, my pride was swollen. I was more than happy to drift away from engineering. For the simple reason that I began to love the engineering of my soul rather than my mind.

Anyway getting back,
Hitherto media which was a medium to communicate unleashing a different world for me but when the garden of flowers transformed into thorns which knew only the thirst of lust I landed up in a different world, making me not to believe what my lecturers taught me.

The “M” world was a battle of TRPS and no more an encyclopedia of information. People’s suffering was their source of bread and repetitive exposure of blood smeared bodies was the “Moment of the day”

Business

According to studies,

Children who grow up watching violence on television tend to have mental disorders. And in our country wailing with the sufferers is a common norm; business men have been taken undue advantage making profits of the dollops of our tears.

Did you know Door Darshan makes the highest profits ( no complaint, I like DD)and then followed by local channels making a whopping 60 cores and more.

Indeed our emotions are very valuable.

Hard work pays too.

Hard work is of course paid but then again, depends on the employer too. Learn a lot about the subject you are interested in. Specialize in a specific beat. But you must have knowledge about other beats as well. For those who don’t know: Beat is the area you are reporting in.

Well this blog is written not to scare away budding journalists but to tell you that media is not all about creating awareness, educating. There’s a lot to learn before you teach.
Don’t fall prey to any body’s misdeed. Listen to yourself. Do your best. Good luck

WEDONOMICS

2009-05-04T12:38:00.000-07:00

should the 60,000 party merge with 50,000 or

Is 40,000 interested in 60, 000.

So what if 40,000 is only a 10,000 less.

Welcome to the new area of study wedonomics, a portmanteau of wedding and economics

Where Brides are up for grabs!

All you need to do it : Buy now.

At a party, the amount the daughter in law earns was a much talked about subject than her nature/ character. What if she loses her job? Is she removed from the post of the home manager as well?

Where are we heading to? Of course money makes many things but money isn’t everything. More recently, due to recession when a relative lost a job on the wedding day it wasn’t revealed. Fearing the marriage would be stopped. I fear losing my own self in this wedonomics.

People joining in engineering or medicine to earn a good bride or groom has been a custom since the Neolithic age. Well I’ve witnessed cases where girls who are earning good but unfortunately they turned to be disastrous wives. How would you judge a woman or a man by the money she or he earns?

Perhaps! A person is no longer judged by the friends he makes but by the money he makes.

Untitled, intentionally

2008-09-26T07:51:00.000-07:00

Eklavya was a great student of the archery maestro, Dronacharya. Though his altruism is highly commendable, the bottom line remains: “The guru had been a light house for him”.

Similarly, at the zenith of a labyrinth, we know we have a confidant to depend upon. But, there are children from the lower strata of the society, who do not have basic amenities. They echo the famous proverbial frog in the well.

They need somebody to confide in, to be mentored and to be listened to. And most importantly they need some body to lacerate their inhibitions. It fingers to both girls and boys. They need a Dronacharya in their life and you could be one. There is a thin line between thinking and working towards what you feel. This is your chance to be the change you want to see around.

Dronacharya and Eklavya- tutoring and mentoring program is an initiative by BHUMI, a Hyderabad based NGO in collaboration with the government of Andhra Pradesh, media partnered by BIG 92.7 FM. BHUMI aims to tutor and mentor the children of Government schools across the state. The mentor or the tutor will be facilitated with a government school near to his/her place, will be trained in required fields by specialists from top colleges. The only investment is four hours a week.

We need 1000 mentors, 200 tutors and 60 coordinators.

If you think you could one of the 1260 people who could make a difference by your zeal to change their lives and change yours too in the process,then Join the revolution. A thought could make a difference to a child’s life. You don’t need any embellishments but an attitude to change.

You gain a lot in the process, as well. You learn to communicate effectively .As mentoring your colleagues, friends is easier but traversing to the lowest strata of the society and shoving their fears and inspiring them to carving a niche is a challenge.

Let’s challenge our abilities and work towards the betterment of our country.

After all, we outline the wrong-doing of the society too.

Life's not that short after all..

2008-09-19T01:53:00.000-07:00

“Choose what you like to do; else you have to like what you choose to do”

I want to be a:ABC
But I am doing a course in: XYZ
Cos I dislike: LMN

And there are not many options

The labyrinth of the mind is complex. The tributaries of the arteries and the veins were so perplexed when studying about it, itself. And the various hormones it produces during different times giving result to unfathomable emotions is even worse.

However, I shall not choose to speak about them.

Anyway , Let ABC be a course in Fashion technology
XYZ a course in mechanical Engineering
And LMN a course in computers science Engineering

Each of us has a dream but not every one has a supporting family. They will support you in every Damn thing but your career and its palpable they know the best or a chintu or mintu failed in that hence you are not allowed to do it.

No body bothers to count the failures in the field chosen by our folks as they are not known to us, hence they are not entitled to be taken into account After choosing a course decided by the elite members of the family, the scape goat I mean the soon-to-become engineer tries his best to prove himself. And then slogs to learn his anti-course, fractures his brain over what Dennis Ritchie had done THIRTY-SIX years ago and then secures a job.

Alas! Luck favors the Scapegoat and he does what the rest of his clan is doing. Chose a stream which partially interests him and then land up in a field which has no relation with interest to him

Well as I quoted in one of my poems:

Raise a voice. Make some noise.
It’s your life. It’s your choice.

Wake up before the zeal for your dream dies..

As some sane person quoted:

“The biggest tragedy is not death but what dies inside us while we are alive”

So, don’t kill it. Keep the desire burning till you learn to fend for yourself and then live your dream.

Life is not that short after all..

thanks for the read :)

IT's all Fucked up !

2008-09-15T01:11:00.000-07:00

… yea yea, I know being an activist I shouldn’t be using derogatory terms to degrade the existing system… but

Picture this:

Clad in a salwar-kurta-duppatta-whatever I PATIENTLY wait outside my C- programming lab ( that’s where the interviews take place in my college)

After the Denial at Company L ,
melodrama at Company O,
A shock at company S
and company E respectively
I scraped through company R (facsimiles, artificial INTELLIGENCE helps)to my and dad's, mom's, relatives, cousins' relief.

After graduation, like any sane person, my friends and I were geared up to join the new company.
The company said it would take a LITTLE time for the good news.

And relatives (who dont spare even a drop-of-a-hat) Hymn “Engineering ayipondante, Job Ready” ( as soon as ur done with engg ur ready with a job)

It is all music until you get the major JHATKA of your joininnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng date.. The joining is much longer than the n's used.
A TYPICAL convo:

Friend 1 : when is ur DOJ (date of joining) (already working)
F2: they say Jan 2009
F3: Ohh. I didn’t get any letter yet..

F4 : I have been mailing them.. but no response

F5: Lets’s wait.

F6: F7, I heard ours is in December 2008

F7: oo..is it ? when is yours, F8 and F9 ?

F8: They say anytime before June ?

F7: 2008, 2009 or 2010??

F9: I'l help myself!

Seriously, F9 (help yourself)!

If your company does not call you even after three months of graduation.Stop waiting. It is not your maternal uncles company to stick to it. Move on.

Hunt for a job! It is your life! It is your career!

Statutory warning: Join a course related to computers CSE or IT

As your work place will cater students from all branches. Since the Engineering college, they couldn’t facilitate all the 600+(or-) student into one class they distributed them into fancy brand names like ECE,EEE..

P.S:

the scenario is such in local collegees.. you wont know the scene until you are out of College.. So, be prepared !!

Luckily i have my Ngo work and other work to back on but, there are many who are wasting their precious time in nothing at all. Think about them!

Tanks for the read! :)